28/09/07

hmmmm.....woke up late...didnt wanted to go sch today..but the tot of handle-ing proposal made mi wake up n go to sch...HAI...reason for not keen of going to sch today...i noe the tutorial will end very fast...n ya..true enough it did...wad more i was late..=.= after class dismiss, our class still stayed in class n tok abt some CD stuff n class t-shirt..hmmm...n i went fc5 to meet nigel..n today karen was not ard..=.= so i haven submit yet!! SIGH~~~

met up wif sun for awhile? n off to sgh...stayed there from ard 130 to 730...6 hrs...sigh...it jz made mi felt so heavy each time...he got tied down for trying to get off the bed...it was so tight tat injure his arms...he couldn't eat nor drink...jz on dips...when will he recover..i wish and pray for his speedy recovery...

went to chinese garden after tat..n to je for supper...i skip my dinner...cz...i dunno y either....

today was consider quite an enjoy-able day for mi...haha..=) although my leg is hurting like nobody busniess now!! haha...but...=)

i wont do it anymore...at least i try~~ haha!!

tired mango
1:26am

jealousy kills...so don be jealous! XD

i dunno wad to blog... went look for bin after sch today...met karen too...had a short tok wif her...n dinner wif bin...n off to sgh..=(

in no position to either...=)

pale n skinny face...wif few tubes ard...arms tat seem like bones...sigh...i remember how he used to carry mi in his arm...the face..the smile..couldn't eat or drink anything...pamper-ing him like a small kid...maybe tat was how he used to pamper mi last time...hurts when he tried to listen to wad the doctor was saying...watery eye of his...jz felt so heavy...

at least...i have an ans in mind...

i wanna be strong....cz i have to...n i mz!!!
don wanna depend on anyone..cz they will leave sooner or later...n i seriously hates it...
the fact of accpeting ppl into my life is easy...but the fact for them to leave...i cant take it...so back to mi...i choose not to let anyone to enter den...except for a few...

hate the feeling of saying goodbyes...

but gd things alway come to an end...

emo mango
10:37pm

hmmm...3 day since sch started...hmmm...seems like alot of things have happen...haha~~ but i dunno wad happen either..SP NPCC...Unit NPCC... studies...aiyo~~

hmmmm...there is this guy...hu we met each other at UG conferrence...=x hmmm...not same grp..didnt tok..no nth..but somehow...he remembered mi..for hu noes wad reason..haha..=x fate bah...LOL..at first i jz find him familiar....but i tot..is jz maybe meet him somewhere at sp..den later he came to mi..LOL..n said UG conferrence blah blah...tat is how we really started toking..LOL..damn weird rite...haha! i remembered him is becz he speak up for one of the tok..n damn lame..LOL..but i dunno y he remember mi..=.=

hmmmm...today i met wif banana didi...william dage....Mr Sun...Xavier! LOL...actually cz mr sun wanna meet for dinner? LOL..banana didi n william dage went for kayaking course today..LOL...hmmm another 4 days for them i suppose...haha! jiayou jiayou..XD

today moved the spnpcc room into spncc room...LOL!!! hmmm..big thx to wenbin, xavier and hong kuan! haha...all their effort n hard work in moving the room..n clearing all rubbish! haha.. i didnt help much leh...tried to do those little bit of things...but den...LOL...at least i don wanna be their fu dan!

haiz...wanna go down sgh...hopefully nth happen..praying for the best...wish for the best...*wan for the best...*
is not tat i didnt care or didnt bother...but sometime...wad can i do? sigh...

today...tired...very tired bah...hmmmm....went for pool at JE! bloody hell..wanna check if i am above 16 anot..wahlao..only mi kena! HAIZ...remind mi of 1st may! haha...tat day...hmmmm... after tat day...my life carry on....XD

hmmm...i realise...one of my weak spot...hmmm.....probably jz realise recently...gd or bad i dunno...hopefully is gd...

i wanna rest more...study more...play less..slack less..haha...

i don wann think too much!

my life is very fine now..i am happy wif everything tat i have now...don let mi demand for more...don wanna lose any either....XD

mango ko-ed
11:15pm

take care ok...=)

first day for sch...sch reopen! LOL...could not wake up to accompany CL to sch...haha! last nite cant slp till like 4? LOL! went bed at ard 130..n jz kept rolling n rolling...till 4..HAIZ...woke up at 6..n roll again..cz suppose to meet CL at 715...den cant get myself off the bed..n jz keep rolling n rolling..LOL..till 715 i decided to climb out of bed..or i be late! CL sry..for ps-ing u today~

went sch...STAT lecture..hmm..i actually listened! LOL..=x den CRS tutorial it sux! ENG..SIgH... break...i drop by at the booth...but den...nth much to do..my presence does not make much different..so i decided to go for my lunch instead...could not eat either...so jz had a prata and a drink...hmmm...den walk back to SB, took the short cut back....late for lesson..but hu cares~ tutorial end early...so i went to the booth early too...n happen to be no one? LOL...i dunno...den shiyong came n go...bin was at i dunno where..dunno doing wad either..LOL...CL accompanied mi thr...LOL...n so on n on...too lazy to blog abt the event......emo today..probably bah...

i dunno wad went wrong..but sth jz went wrong...maybe nth was wrong either....jz thinking too much..aiya...guess guess guess..think think think.. also no point...cz nth will be clear thou....so be it...fate may one day decide where it should be...=)
haha...expected situation again? probably...
the feeling of it is laggi more sucky...

i should find the solution....

received a call today...hmmm...do wad u wish to do...don give up becz of mi...the youth is still urs..=) i will support wadever decision u made..=) i understand...=]

i will be strong...n stand on my own....at least...i am trying to....

being strong n independent is sth i nv like doing since last time...but situation alway let mi have to do so....becz this is wad the world is like...damn sucky...i hate it...

emo-ing mango...
10:26pm

wanna have a gd nite slp..which i noe i probably cant....

promise to take good care of urself....

BOO! LOL...first thing...who is bullies hu tag on my blog? LOL...name urself! =x

22th September 2007
hmmm...nth much of a day..=x i slp till evening...LOL..ok la late afternoon bath n went out..carry on wif the recee on bugis area...finally is done! hehe..=x proposal is 3/4 done..only left wif picture..HAIZ...sian-ed...okie! after tat...went catch a show n home sweet home...hmmm....happy day..=)


nth much to blog... tml sch start liao..=( oh no~~~ holiday seem over so fast! wad have i spent my time for the past 4 wks? hmmm..let mi c...i dunno either...it seem...most is for npcc..LOL..=x if not is slack at home...or go out play! LOL...

nv like the feeling of waiting...

mango tired
4:03pm

jz now cousin suddenly came...so end off blogging..haha~~ hmmm....got nag by jeremy for scoring so low for my GPA....haha..x= hmmm...n there he was telling mi how imp each test, project n exam was..hmmm~~ LOL...sry lo..=x i will try to work harder nx sem...hmmm...should chat less..online less le bah..MUG! GPA 2.5 quite bad bah..i realise tat too...hmmm...motivated to work harder nx sem...study more..slack less..play less..HAIZ..no life again? probably bah..haha...
life in poly is slack-able..but for gd result...hmmm...not easy too le bah...mango jiayou jiayou for nx sem..GO GO GO~~~
try to be less lazy..work harder..hmm..can i do it? play less study more! np less n study more too~~ LOL...hmmm...i can think..but can i do it? LOL! so sucky...=x BLEAH...

i slack thr today...instead of doing the things i should do...like amazing race proposal...flyers...packing my tables....LOL...i basically ended up watching tv n chatting..HAI...hmmm...time to get myself moving le bah...

JIAYOU JIAYOU GO GO!!!

action speaks louder den word bah...hmmm...

no more bgr problems...no more you de mei de problems...concentrate concentrate concentrate...=) my focus...don wan distraction...studies..np...=)

can u not leave..no u cant...
do u really have to...yes u do...
how much un-willing...i still have to accpet the fact...
went thr once...one more time...will i able to take it? hopefully...
learn to be independ...to stand on my own!

5:32pm

now wad time le? still blog..LOL..duno leh...lazy do proposal le...brain dead! LOL....
*cough cough*
haha...hate being sick n have to do things..lucky i am not v sick..if not..i sure dunno wad is going to be like mi liao~~ haha!!!

20th Sep 2007
meet nigel n CL at 815 at paya lebar mac...we have breakfast n started toking abt the amazing race for SP_NPCC...left there at 1030 n head down to sp clubroom..hmmm..for the banner thingy bah...wanted to leave after lunch which mean 1 or 2 like tat...to go for recee..but in the end..we stayed till 530..haiz...started recee at our first station at 6? HAI...6 to 9 recee lo...walk n walk..think n think..n of cz..slack alot too! haha..=x den we went have dinner at marina sqaure since we stop there...den we stayed at the food court till ard 10 plus den walk to city link to think of our last station to recee...but shops all close le..so we sat at a beanches in city link n toked all the way till 1130 n off for last train as usual...LOL..

banner painting were great although tiring n hot! LOL..maybe cz someone was not ard? LOL!! =x evil mi..=x but had a great time paint...hmmm..xavier art power leh~~ LOL...long long time didnt do 'art' stuff...kinda miss it..alway enjoy design-ing or making things of my own..has alway been sth i love to do...those days...doing art at late nite..trying to chiong for exams...LOL..nice nice..=x tiring but i alway feel a sense of happiness whenever i drawing/colouring or wad ever tat has to making sth of my own...LOL...nice nice bah...now..time not tat flexible liao...cant really spent alot time doing anymore either..haiz...but is still ok...free time = still can do..hehe...

not choosing art when i was in secondary..may or may not be a rite choice...but is all over...i still love doing art...=) in poly didnt choose designing or arts stuff...n choose sth else..i hope is the rite choice too! haha...XD

i still love arts..=)

was a great great day...=) wif bin ard...sure bring the mood higher...LOL! Joker as alway...
LOL...at first things were quiet n smooth sailing when suddenly he come...LOL..tat is where all the nosie lvl come..LOL..lame-ing n cock-ing..haha! as usual...laugher...haha!!

nv fail to smile so far....=)

mango love art!
3:07am

GG mode...

I can only love one person...n tat person is u...=)
In the past u were...
In the present u are...
In the future will u still be?

hmmm..GEMs selected...Introduction to seamanship and boating theory...hopefully i wont regret...its my fourth choice! LOL...

First GEMs registeration experienceCL helped mi..click click ok..EPI class 8...LOL....check time table..mrs ng..my reaction...OMG!! CL..drop it..(first reaction when i saw her name..first thing in my mind...DROP IT..) by the time choose the rest..all gone le..so i took the seamanship..LOL... hopefully i wont regret! haha.. XD

hmmm...i didnt go for sushi either...wanna rest at home! LOL...craving for sushi!!! DAMN! y mz i be sick at this time! HAIZ...i wan sushi..sushi...sushi!!! LOL...

Got to recover fast fast! hmmm...got to chiong CCA Drive man! zzz...HAIZ..do it for the responsibility...bo bian leh! stupidly accpet-ed to chair this event! LOL..but arent doing a gd job cz i didnt do anything till the very last min....hmmm...ownself make my life thiam only...HAIZ...
nvm~ WILL JIAYOU JIAYOU GO GO! haha..=x

super duper iron mango! nv say die attitude!! LOL...=x

currently hungry! but got no food...HAI...cant take my medinice either cz i haven eat....hmmmm...shall go dig for some food after i blog! haha...but waiting for my dinner to come!!! hehe..=x

i am happy..cz i have U...cz i have u..cz i have them...cz i noe u...=)

i dunno wad to blog...

IMU..ILU...LOL..tat all i have to say...XD

missing mango
5:08pm

17/09/2007

Hmmm...yesterday...exactly 1mth away from my Big Day! HAHA!! BLEAH...=x hmmm...
bday has alway been nth but normal day until ... ...

haha..so i don wan only my bday to be the only one tat is special..but everyone ard mi bday to be special too! esp for those i care!! XD haha...

went for meeting..LOL...hmm..kinda srcew-ed up wif mi nearly 3/4 dead! mind cant work properly..so i learnt sth today! hold meeting when u have the energy to think! haha..
plus...so cant really concentrate bah...meeting goes on n on...den all the things i type was gone! cz i haven save n xavier went shut down the lappy..HAIZ...bo bian! haha..try to recall wadever i could during the meeting...

after tat went lunch n club room to slack! haha...dunno wad to do..sian sian..so end up using clubroom desktop..went online re-type everything..n send email...LOL...fall aslp on the table too! haha..=x den later Mr. VP came! FINALLY! haha..den later i dunon doing wad..they playing game..i slacking? stone-ing? resting? i dunno..LOL..slack all the way till 8! haha...ard there la..den head to vivo for dinner...n went outside the vivo there..the sky garden i suppose along there found a place n sit...sea was nice! windy..LOL..jz sat there chatting n lame-ing...haha~

enjoy-able day...=]

i was bullied!!! HAIZ!!! thiam lo...keep kena bully..hair kena mess up la...WTH..=( haha!

feeling sick now...probably going to slp le..cannot make it liao!

i noe u wanna say i didnt take care le..haha..alway don listen..keep slping late..haha..BLEAH..=x but still I Love U..although not as much as u..but i still do..=)

Smile smile...=)

sick mango
3:30am

i don wanna be happy alone..i wan everyone ard mi to be happy too~ esp those hu r dear to mi..XD

over-rated..over-reacted..over over over...
line drawn...limit drew...
i still care...

... ...

mango emo
6:17pm

(someone complaint tat it was too small..LOL..)
I LOVE U...

Photo upload-ed.. Request granted! XD

blogging at this hr..i dunno y...but feeling emo...

i am sry..sry..sry..i really am sry...
don misunderstand...
wo xi wang...wo men kuai kuai le le de guo mei yi tian...

i is don like the helpless...wo neng de man guo!

i wish those ppl beside mi is happy..can be happy...esp for those i care n concern for...
ppl hu meant someone to mi...=)

emo mango
2:35am

no training tml either...probably gd too bah...

empty empty...

i wanna go out for a walk...

air ard mi is suffocating mi..

goodbye...

dead mango
4:03pm

i ... ...

crush --> like --> love
this is the process...
able to have many crush... lesser like n only one love...
crush can be gone w/o effort
like can be gone with effort
love can nv be gone no matter how much effort u put in...cz there will have a large impact on u...can let go n overcome...but nv able to forget...it will alway be there! fixed!
may have more den one love...but each time in ur heart there can only be a love at a time...love may change but nv forget..
don be sad cz is gone...be happy cz it once happen...
is all in ur memories~~
they may be gone..but will alway be in ur memories...u once have them..nth last forever...
gd things alway come to an end...treasure it before it end...

love someone is jz wish for tat person to be happy...will do everything at ur own expense for the someone to be happy...the smile on their face worth more den anything else...the smile on their face will led to a smile on ur face no matter wad...love-ing someone is not abt being wif tat someone 24/7 but to keep tat someone in ur heart n mind 24/7...love-ing someone is to be there for th someone when they need-ed u no matter wad...

love is a complicated things tat words r unable to explain...use ur heart to see...ur feel to sense... ur action to prove...XD

emo-ing mango
9:12pm

haiz..brota flunk his mid yr badly...SIGH~

UG conference over~ LOL..went for class chalet for yesterday n today..LOL..is only a 2 day 1 nite chalet...hmmmm...wenbin having his class chalet too! LOL..different venue..at first i tot it was quite far away..but in fact...i realise is rather near bah...haha!

hmmmm....yesterday suppose to meet my classmates at pasir ris at 130pm..LOL..have lunch n buy stuff den head to aloha loyang..correct spelling? think so..haha! but in the end...i only manage to reach pasir ris at 4..LOL! i told them to go first la..cz is like..ermm..i noe i sure late one..so ya..nvm lo...y late? cz was in lala land n toking on the phone? LOL! slp toking bah..=x abit ah..=x LOL! den reach le...big sia...i nv go there b4 de..alway go downtown east of costal sand de...but the chalet was great~ big...have stoves 2 rooms n so on! LOL....=x

when i reach...some were playing mahjong alrdy...den some in room chatting...i went first thing was to the bed! LOL..=x slack ard awhile..i think i went c them play mahjong..n played afew round..b4 slacking in front of tv..n started watching..n they were comment-ing on the tv programme! LOL..=x n den..i went back to bed..LOL...try to get some rest bah..feel tired bah..cz it was a double deck one..i love the top..so i was resting there..when one guy from my class came in..Mr JX aka auntie! LOL..=x came in w/o noe-ing tat i was in the room too...den later i pop my head out while he is abt to leave the room..=x LOL...den he was like shock? LOL...n went out of the room saying there is someone in the room! LOL..=x ya...called cz BBQ going to start..so everyone going to leave the chalet to the pit..is quite near la..haha..so i went down n head to the pit..hmmmi didnt BBQ this time round..i ate! LOL! they ordered from ezbz..correct name anot? i dunno..but i think wholesale food taste nicer! LOL..=x opps~ but ya..food ate...den were play some games n having forefit..LOL!!!! indian poker...LOL...n some other lame games..haha...made alot of noise..LOL...one of the forefit is having to pose in a *** position..=.= LOL!!!!!! cock..end up 2 guy kena! HAHAA! damn funny can..after tat all didnt play liao! Haha..=x den went back into the chalet...(sound short rite..cut short ma..=x) den played mahjong n watched tv...(i don really noe how to play la...) den after tat played PSP..watch tv...n off to room to play more games n drinks...tried some dunno wad 25% alchol super not nice la! LOL..=x YUCK! haha..=x jz drink abit only..cz i don like the taste..haha...jz drink bit by bit when i lost in the game...haha! den played murder-er...hand hold type bah..LOL! to increase the challenge..=x n later guessing number...follow by truth n dare..LOL! kena one damn lame forefit...n truth Q..LOL...

followed by toking ghost story.. LOL..scary sia! haha..=x i was on my 'bed' n here comes moon besdie mi n later jon...at first was wif laitheng...aiya..we jz keep moving ard...haha! but i stay on the bed la..=x lazy move down..haha! den when the ghost story abt to end...(i was sticking my leg out of the bed) den my friend from below pull my leg!!! LOL..i got the shock out of my life la! LOL...scream-ed n grab-ed onto moon...LOL!!!! pls la..really scary leh...haha! den all kena shock too! LOL..den later drift to different small small conversation...den i fall aslp alrdy...from wad i can recall..when i falling aslp..PH was on the bed wif mi! LOL...i slp near the 'stair' to go down...so i was wondering how did he manage to go down the bed..LOL...tat is ard 4 plus plus le bah..haha..den when i woke up..everyone is outside chatting..only mi n two more gers slping...haha! woke up ard 530 bah..

so i jz went out n started stone-ing on the sofa..LOL..it was damn bloody cold when i wake up..LOL... den later decided to walk to catch sun rise..LOL..is jz walking ard la...haha..den went to the bench..n emo! LOL..not emo la..but jz c the bench n stuff..didnt catch the sun rise thou..LOL...at first we got our direction wrong too! haha..so ya...after awhile went back to chalet..n order MAC! LOL..hungry leh..=x ok..den later we all went to the room n tok again..n later soon..all fall into lala land...till mac came! haha..=x we ate n stuff..den got food ma..hyper le! haha..so end up chatting in the room..toking abt... LOL stuff..things tat is meant to be tok behind the door! LOL...i didnt quite understand wadever they trying to say..=x haha! too noob le! LOL..=x so i jz listen n listen..wif question mark all over..LOL...den later check out..when by the pool..wanted to wait for the shuttle bus to come...in the end alot ppl..so we decided to walk to bus stop..haha! tat is when i realise the different chalet is quite near to each other..haha! ermm..den took a bus to mrt station..den went white sand awhile..haha! n off home~~ LOL..online blogging..alot of words hor...=x

jz an account on our class chalet..haha..=x so don need to read..plus is all cut short one..LOL!

so near yet so far~~

mango bored
1:28pm

keep thinking today is friday lo! LOL..=x dunno y...haha...

UG conference day 2! LOL...
could not wake up...but den mz pull myself out of bed after 15min of laziness! haha..=x den so on n on...is damn bloody cold too! LOL..=x den registration n so on..den ok..join back into my grp~ LOL...forum talk bah..still okok...but too early..n is heavy rain...super nice condition to slp! LOL..=x den after tat..ermm..tea break..=.= LOL..den briefing for SAFTI trip..den off to SAFIT! LOL...den back to lunch..=.= LOL..den amazing race~ LOL..damn lame can..=.= den back to rp...den some grp interaction n stuff...den off home! LOL..long trip home..cut short my day today..not ok..not as boring as yesterday~ LOL...n got interact la...n i am the ONLY ger in the whole grp la~ got another 2 lady..from china~ LOL..so ya~~ sad-ed hor!

ok..more or less..tat is it..haha..=x tml last day of conference le..LOL...

hmmm..afew tots to share...
maybe people nowadays maybe we should think more for others in general den for ourselves..maybe it will make in world a better place to live in..but by human nature...selfish-ness...ppl will alway think for themselves..how r they going to benefits n be the strongest to survive.. neglecting others...benefits on the expense of other...being easily push over...end up will only be at the losing coner...this is jz the reality of the world bah...
nowadays..ppl will jz say...y bother? it does not affect mi? so y bother..nth to do wif mi ma...bother liao let ppl say only..don care la...also nth to do wif mi...don so kaypo la...mind ur own business...LOL...so only when problems come...we start to think to bother..only if it affect us...sigh...
i don deny...i have such attitude too...but well..probably..is jz the environment that mould us into the character n attitude we have..the influence n so on..such things is like..from young de bah... cant comment much..cz still v noob!

jz some tots tat came to my mind today..LOL...

tml is the last day! ENDURE waking up at 5am or 530am for tml? LOL! last day! LOL..like CIBTC RC SIA! LOL..=x but den slp earlier la..haha..=x noeing other UG grp ppl..hmmm...get to learn more abt how other UG works n stuff...LOL..so on n on~ LOL...maybe will jz get to learn sth...willingness to learn~ XD haha...

dunno wad else to blog le..tml last day! LOL...

mango fighting wif zzz monster...
10:11pm

orange con mi again~ i alway fall for her trap...dunno to LOL or sigh...well..she meant well too..do u? LOL!
sry...but finally...i said it out once again...i noe...mz be damn hurting bah...sry..saying sry again...but wad else can i say beside saying sry to u...
u told mi...not to let go once again...second time le bah...haiz...
n i didnt...

not sad...the smile will still be on my face later on....

am i to be angry wif orange? or should say a thx to heR? LOL..probably 2nd one bah...don need mail rite! LOL..read blog~

today is finally the UG conference! LOL..haha..1 day is down...2 more days to go! LOL..=x mango endure!! LOL....

listening to those speech make mi feel like slping..LOL..=x nearly doze off..but i didnt dare to! cz was wearing full uni! n they keep on taking pic n filming..LOL..mz uphold NPCC image! LOL..=x

ok...shall not go into alot of detail...cz i am currently too tired! LOL...hmmm..but one thing...we r all well fed during the conference! LOL...keep on eating sia...ok...3 meals provided! LOL...can eat till shuang shuang sia...tea break lunch den tea break again! LOL..=x food serve..not too bad...quite nice! LOL..=x was split into grp at the later part of today! lol..ok ok la...so usual...get to noe each other name n so on...LOL...

today..i feel tat...is like every single one of us down at the UG conference today...is like..there is one thing we have in common...tat is our commitment for each n indiviual of our own Uniform Group..haha..=x

maybe ppl will be wondering y...we or even i bother spending so much time in helping out...well..jz our passion...interest? a place where we felt tat we belong to...haha..XD

giving up time of going out wif friends n playing for npcc..maybe seem like wasting time..but is ok...cz we r willing to do so bah...of cz..mz balance too! LOL...

today my class went mei hus! i wanna go too..but sadly i cant la...down for event! LOL..hope i will learn sth thr this 3 day conference...LOL..although i felt tat...is not really suitable for mi...cz i arent those type of person hu will speak up...but well..go for exposure bah! LOL...

if i am able to turn back time now..i will be a better cadets...to prompt more Question..to learn more things...so i could be a better cadet inspector now! LOL...
a gd instructor probably is mould since cadets...but well..i am for sure not one gd one...but at least i am trying...

class chalet coming up too! LOL...haven meet my classmate for nearly 1 wks or 2 wks le bah..LOL! looking forward to it? probably bah...but i be tired too! since i have to wake up at like 5 am for sat n sun! LOL...but is ok..XD

wo shi xin gan qing yuan de...i am willing...=)

mango ko-ed
9:31pm

bloging everyday~ shows how bo liao i am at home! LOL..x= not really la..but jz love to blog n type..wadever tat have happen...so even if memories fade..still can read back to find lost memories..haha..n laugh at myself! LOL..=x

ok..today woke up at 1! LOL...nice slp? not really..slp at ard 3 plus bah..den woke up at 7..went back to slp...den woke up at dunno wad time reply sms..den slp wake up slp wake again~ LOL..n finally 1 woke up..=x haha..=x

so usual..wash up n eat~ went online n vivien asked mi to help her transfer $$ so i agreed n den went downstair to transfer..n back home online again..n here am i blogging..LOL..x=

i wanna watch why why love! LOL...cz the actor very shuai! LOL..banana didi intro the show to mi..=x haha...den tat day v bored..so decided to watch...n actor so shuai tat make mi wan to carry on watching..LOL! storyline ok ok la..love love de lo~ LOL...huo da aka jun xiang aka xiao mei...LOL..handsome la! shuai dao~~~~ LOL! den the brota huo yan also ok ok..he is cute bah..=x but huo da is shuai n cute n so on n on..LOL~~
ok..i don usual got crazy over them...so now..i am not crazy over them either..LOL...they have no priority...but den jz watch can kill time n laugh also~ LOL..n of cz c shuai ge!!! LOL..=x

ok ok..=x haha...i think nth for mi to do today..my campcraft test haven set leh..v sian..lazy to set also...LOL! but will la...YESH..do it for the cadets!! LOL..=x

will be going out wif vivien on the 19 sep! hopefully nth cock up on tat day~ LOL!! we said wanna go out from ermm tat time quit job till now haven go yet! so i is miss her~ LOL! =x wanna go out wif her~ LOL..play play play! LOL..=x

today staying at home whole day...haha...mz slp early worz! fri, sat and sun going for UG conference..mz wake up v v early! LOL..ok la...yesterday went the briefing..hmm..they make it sound as if the conference is very big like tat...so aiya..jz go listen lo..maybe i may get motivated n inspired by their speech! LOL..=x

met nessa too! LOL..wahhh...i think the last time i met her was like 2 yrs plus plus ago...haha..=x the feeling of meeting her...hmmm...still feel close to her bah...same feeling as yrs ago...LOL~ =) haha..she be going to conference too! LOL..gonna be split into 20 grps...if fated..we maybe in the same grp! LOL..=x hopefully? haha...=x wait n c how lo~~ LOL..=x

i wanna watch why why love~ LOL..=x nice show bah..=x not cz got shuai ge ar...LOL..=x BLEAH...but the storyline itself bah...but as usual..is all so drama one...in the real world..will there be such things? LOL..maybe there is bah...but not on mi! LOL...shows, drama..r all shows..LOL..tat y..alway nice to be in dreamland..XD

who will be there if i ever needa someone..will u? u? or u? or i will be on my own...LOL..realistic of the world..depend on noone but urself...but still i wish tat i could depend on someone...tat someone be there alway~ haha~~

saying gd bye to someone u care...wad more can be more hurting den tat..

dreaming mango~
2:42pm

dare to dream! wif dreams, wif hopes may get disappointments...wif disappointment u learn to be strong..to stand up..to treasure it when u get it...=) without dreams n hopes...wad is life all abt den? wif no disappointment...jz to protect urself from being hurt..den will be happy? hurts will become scar..scar will be there to remember to hurt u..is ok to be hurt...but stand up n be strong...because life still carry on...read ahead is still long...with dream u noe ur direction..=)
but do i have a dream now? LOL..i doubt so...tat y i don have my direction yet! sad-ed.. =x

bored! LOL..woke up so early...n now i have nth to do...probably going out at 5 to head off to newton mrt n go for the UG breifing...haiz! meeting up wif suresh...sian-ed!

i realise nessa will also be going from her blog..LOL..meet if fated! LOL..=x ok..den from now till 5 i wont noe wad to do....somehow...jz cant have a nice, long peaceful slp..sigh! last nite i was damn tired..so i went to bed...slp at ard 1 bah..woke up at 430, den 8 plus den fall back to slp n woke up at 930, 1030,1130 n finally 12, i decided to wake up...

was v tired last nite..but still i jz cant have a nice..long wonderful nite! sigh!!

pocket big big hole..damn no life..i wanna do sth..learn sth..other den go out n npcc-ing..=.= sian-ed... but wad can i do..i dunno also...LOL!

life is boring...meaning-less..wad so ever~

being angry wif someone...i think i haven being really serious angry wif some one for a long long time..dulan have la...angry don have bah....LOL..understanding mango! LOL...=x being angry wif someone makes mi cry! LOL.cz if i am angry wif someone..it means tat the someone would have mean sth to mi..tat y i get angry over the someone...den once again..if may not be angry..but hurt! LOL...emotions r so complicated...words cant be used to explain some~

i am childish? maybe bah...being a child is alway the happiest thing...without noe-ing anything..simple minded...jz some one to play wif them...they be happy...=)
they be happy n content easily...but when grow up into teens, adults n so on...thinking change...noe-ing more things n fact...ppl so human nature demand for more...

the realistic of the world..sometime i simply hate it...to survie in this realistic world...u have to be realistic...sigh...it simply sux!

being wif u is the happiest time in my life...for everything u done for mi...i noe n appreciate it.. u still the best to mi...
time has change...u r still willing to do for mi...but am i able to do wad u have done for mi? am i still able to give u wad i used to give u...
sometime i feel tat...i tried..but somehow feels tat i cant...

all i wan is for u to be happy..hurting u is the last thing i ever wanna do...

mango emo-ing
1:24pm

wish i was the one u turn to...but i am not...wanna help...but u didnt let mi to...i don noe wad i could do..but jz to take wadever...maybe i am jz not needed to u bah...after all..i am jz a nobody...
but i will still be there...turn to mi...if ever one day u needed someone...at least i am here..is jz tat u didnt noe...
wanna noe wad happen but ... ...
it was buried mths ago...a full stop is dot n nv be removed... =)
mean nth...so be it...i accept it...
i wont change anything...cz i don wan to do so...

super tired today..didnt slp well last nite...XD n manage to wake up at 630 today..attendance v bad..make mi pissed off...i dunno y they don wanna come..somemore is..ermm sec 3? NCOs! haiz..out of 9 only 3...one said he is sick! ok la...sick wad u wan mi to do...one go jb..=.= for duno wad also...aiya..the rest un-contact-able...aiya..wad can i do...they don wan come..got badge also don wan come..so be it la...

NCOs..wif such attitude...wad can i do la...the course is for their own benefit..to earn badge yet they don wan..wahlan..forget it la..those badge means nth to them too...those position n stuff..jz reflect on their interest n attitude...sux! haiz..maybe i sux too..tat y...

sent them to the seng kang CC...haiz...asked the cadet to call n so on..ya~~ end up we left without them...today total attendance is 16..yesterday was 25! zzz..stupid la..jz get irritated when is like..is for them lo..not anyone else..yet they still like tat...i even bother to wake up early n go wif them! ok..today sent them there..den i am not needed...cz is like those ppl down there r CIs too..n everything will jz be provided for them...so i was thinking wad am i suppose to do...haha!

in the end i left SK...wanted to go home liao...den wenbin called back cz i missed call him.. LOL...he self destruct..haha..so end up going out wif him..walking ard wif my area tee n track pant..LOL..pt-kit attire!! haha..
yup yup..thx wenbin for keeping mi company today...=) big big thx to him! LOL...

things will be fine..don be sad, pissed, irritated n so on...i cant help u in doing anything...jz wish tat..the tot of mi makes u feel happy...=)
wish to help..but well..nth i could do...be happy..=)

had alot of laughter today!!! LOL..laughing like nobody business...damn no image le! LOL!!! haha...time pass fast today! LOL!
once again..thx wenbin korkor for brighten-ing up my day today...=)

today bus fare damn ex..i think i spend nearly $10 jz mainly on transport! haha...XD

mango tired...
10:35pm

don be sad, irritated n so on...i could feel it...stay happy..be happy..jiayou bah!!! XD

tired tired tired..could not slp last nite...ard 1 den fall to lala land bah..manage to wake up at 630 this morning..went down to unit to accompany my sec 2 n 3 for their civil defence...

arrived at unit at ard 720? bus suppose to leave at 730 but unfortunately the bus was late..so we waited..n left at ard 8? LOL... went there..nth do much...at first i was the only CI...boring lo...den pingyi(nigel sch) came 3 cadets..but wif a CI too! LOL..finally got someone to accompany..but den i was shy..u noe...LOL...i is no EQ de..LOL!

slack slack ard...den stand outside the lecture room n feel the wind! LOL..c lucky..today they were doing stuns...flying fox! wif human stopper! LOL..damn nice...den so on n on..WOW! cool! haha..wanted to take pic..but they were too fast! LOL...i cant catch..haha..=x den went to cateen to rest n eat sandwich cz i was too hungry! LOL...my cadets were hungry too la..but den~ LOL!

after tat our food from HTA came! LOL! n unpacking n stuff..i didnt eat their food..simply sux i suppose? LOL..but they had mango pudding! LOL...hehe..=x i jz love mango pudding man! LOL..=x den settle their lunch n so on...ard 130 left the tampines camp n went to TM to had our lunch..ate at food cultre...tot of ECHO! LOL...duno y...but jz ya~~ LOL..ate lunch n went walk ard TM went toy r us!! LOL..no image..ppl stare at us..like wad..cz was playing wif toy..=x opps! =x

den went back to the camp...jz nice they finished their test n doing feedback form...ya~~ so...more or less dismiss time..had complain from the instructor there, tat they were too nosiy n beyond control...so had a small lecture to them..but not by mi...by the another CI from pingyi sec..LOL..she powderfool!! LOL..=x den dismiss le..we waited at the canteen for our bus to come to bring us back to sch..we were at the canteen waiting..ya~~ den tok abit chit chat...haha..den went back to sch..n dismiss.. N ... ...

HOME SWEET HOME! LOL...den online happily chatting too...

today sms ard 80 msges..LOL...KO-ed! haha...
nth much of a day today...but..haha..somehow..i feel happy..XD

mango tired!
6:14pm

emo-ing now...emo emo emo!!! jz now is happy..now is emo-ing..i think i too tired bah..tat y...question mark all over...but i rather leave those marks down there...

qian yan wan yu shou bu qing! den don shou le bah..XD

mango emo
9:48pm

i woke up damn early again...LOL! cz i slp early yesterday? ok..yesterday i was alive for only..ermm...wake up at 4pm went to bed at 12am.. LOL! mango oink oink!

today i woke up at 8! could not slp bah..den jz roll on my bed..roll n roll..fall back to slp n wake up..suppose to wake up at 9..n prepared to go out..but in the end i didnt...so i jz carry on rolling n slping n wake-ing up till ard 1215 bah! LOL... not going to do anything today either..will jz slack thr my day again...haha..=) finally! LOL!... have been going out n out n more out..=x so now..slack! pocket having a VERY big hole alrdy..haiz! haven get my pocket $$ for this mth either...=(

i wanna go OBS sabah! but haiz..12 days...n eat into one whole week of sch time..probably the test wk!! should i still go then? LOL! consider-ing n thinking...but is like...when will u still have the chance to go ya~~~ LOL!! i shall go take part in more pratical event..to upgrade myself..n improve wif skill n not jz slack my way thr again~ LOL...hopefully? =x

wondering if i should go for civil defence n sana tml n tues anot...haizz..i told my OC i will be going le..but den~ go le..like abit pointless cz i wont be doing anything but wasting my time there..looking after my cadets...LOL...c how first bah~ hehe..XD

dulan wif NCO..i spend time doing the campcraft notes...end up cher print out alrdy..pass it to one of the NCOs...n now? i dunno where the hell the notes went to..=.= cock up la....zzzz...

going for UG conference...7, 8 and 9 sep! LOL...n 5 sep having a breifing at a place where i dunno at where also one! LOL..don feel like going for tat..but uncle chin asked mi to! LOL... so most probably will go..but den again..consider bah..LOL..=x hmmm~ all npcc stuff sia! LOL..thiam..but is gd also...if not i wont noe wad to do at home either..LOL! sian sian..

more or less tat is all...probably..wont be meeting u for the whole of nx wk? so when can i meet u again? i dunno too~

class chalet coming up! LOL..happen to fall on the same days as wenbin..but different venue..n mine only last for 2day 1nite..LOL!

so far..tat is all..no programme after tat alrdy bah...other den those weekly training n so on... ohya..service day! 15 sep..which mean another sat is gone! haiz....

mango slack!
1:17pm

echo outing yesterday! but i v emo n moody...ok..woke up damn bloody early can...=.= i dunno..cant slp...so was like rolling on my bed..thiam ar!! soo paiseh..i v attitude today...ate little today too...don ask mi y..i dunno either...no mood to eat..too tired to eat? maybe! LOL...

today i was late! thx to mr sun...hu asked mi to bring my extra HP batt for him when i was abt to leave my hus..=.= but my tat batt..tat time i didnt charge...so i have to charge n wait for it to be at least half fill! LOL..so suppose meet at 4 la...n i left my hus at 4..=.= made amy, william dage, kiathong didi to wait~ LOL..when i reach-ed there..xavier n wenbin also reach le...LOL.. Mr Sun...Thx ar today~~ LOL!

went steamboat..=.= aiya..i basically jz ate chicken! LOL...is so oily can..reallly spoil my mood of eating..LOL...is bad enough..n those food made it laggi worse...didnt do much today bah..sian-ed...

echo took some pic today...but lazy to blog up..LOL..=x they went home after the steamboat..i went to find theng jie n QY! LOL.. dunno..QY said she wanna meet mi? LOL...i don feel like going home so early..i dunno emo-ing..LOL...wenbin left wif mi to look for theng jie! LOL...theng jie so lady today..haha..XD

went home at ard 1117..lol..reach home at 1150..more or less bah..XD

sry for attitude-ing kiathong didi today...n for emo-ing n sian-ing during today's outing...XD

wish kiathong didi to be able to c the light in the tunnel soon! LOL..jiayou bah..jie jie give u support support! do wad u think is rite...=) will support wadever decision u made!

wilson korkor didnt turn up today...

wenbin...don tok rubbish pls! is in the past..over and gone forever...don bring it up again...cz nth can be done..is buried ok...=)

u have alway being there for mi...thx..i is apperciate...=)


only wanna have my dear...mend-ing things back... the one in my heart...

mango KO-ing
1:28am